A Queen is Never Late
by chickenwriter
Summary: A first kiss story.
1. Chapter 1

"Your majesty, you're running a bit late." The queen opened her eyes and sat up in bed. Her room was full as usual. Priscilla, Olivia, Joseph and Charlotte, A moment's privacy would be worth more to her than all the crown jewels.

"A queen is never late, everyone else is simply early." Clarisse purred, stretching her arms up in the air as Joseph chuckled softly, shooing away the rest of the staff. Charlotte ushered out the ladies maids.

"Try explaining that to the Prime Minister, my darling," he kissed her cheek and offered his hand. She took it and slid out of bed, smiling and touching his face. Joseph closed his eyes briefly at her touch.

Everyone in the country seemed to know, and keep quiet about, Joseph's feelings for the queen. He was simply in love with her. Every move she made changed his perspective on the world; the very sight of her could turn his day around.

Clarisse tried her hardest to suppress her own feelings. Instead, she adopted an air of friendship with her head of security, trusting him with her life, and occasionally with her emotions.

Their friendship had been nothing but platonic, which is how Clarisse tried to keep everything. Forging a relationship with her granddaughter had been difficult. Most of the queen's choices were based on duty, and emotions clouded her head.

Joseph had waited patiently through everything, collecting all their moments in the back of his mind. It was hard to look at her without a rush of heat to his skin. Every day he dared to touch her as many times as he could.

"Maybe you and I should just stay here and have a cup of tea" she suggested. His eyes lit up.

"As much as I would like that, your majesty…" He started.

"Yes. You're right. I have duties" Clarisse smiled, "leave me be. I have to get dressed." Joseph nodded and walked out of the room.

While Joseph felt incredibly lucky to spend so much time with the woman he loved, everything ached from overuse. He knew he could not protect the queen as he once had. It broke his heart to think of parting with her for any amount of time, but he had to have her best interests in mind.

Every time he sat at his desk, he opened the drawer to find his drafted retirement letter. It was selfish to keep working for Clarisse. He tried to focus on training Shades to do the best job he could. Yet Clarisse always requested that he be within arm's reach. He couldn't say no.

"Charlotte, make sure that Joseph is available for the party this evening"

"Yes, your majesty" Charlotte scribbled away on her notepad as the queen walked around the gardens, watering her flowers.

"And the guest list has been finalized?"

"Of course, your majesty" Charlotte smiled, "everything is set for Princess Mia's birthday."

"You're right, Charlotte, I'm worried for nothing. You're excellent at what you do."

Charlotte perked up. "Thank you, your majesty. I appreciate that so very much."

"You are very welcome. Please take your lunch. I think I'll have tea in my room and perhaps a short nap." Clarisse smiled at her assistant and put down her watering can.

"I'll ring Olivia, your majesty"

"Thank you, but that won't be necessary." Charlotte nodded and walked away.

Clarisse set off to find Joseph. All she could think about was the way his lips felt against her cheek so early this morning. The way that taking his hand felt so natural. The pit in her stomach as she watched him walk away.

Joseph held his resignation in his hand as he did every day. Page one was his formal resignation letter. Page two was much more personal.

_My dearest Clarisse, _

_I cannot begin to tell you how sorry I am that I must go. I hope you understand that it has nothing and everything to do with my feelings for you. I do not want to leave, but I am no longer able to provide my services…_

He wouldn't be able to give her the letter until every letter, syllable and word was perfect. It was not just a letter to announce his retirement, after all. It was also a letter to profess his love to a woman he had loved for more than 40 years.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door. With the light from the hallway, he could see the outline of his queen, smiling in her summery pink pantsuit.

"Your majesty, the word on the street was that you were going to take a nap…" Joseph stood and scrambled to shove the drafted love letter into the drawer. It closed with the corner of the paper still exposed.

"I was hoping you had a moment, actually" Clarisse stepped into the shadow of the office. She took in the empty cans on the desk, the piles of security briefs needing to be filed, and the corner of the paper sticking out of the drawer. Joseph saw her eyes meet the letter, and stepped in front of the drawer.

"I always have time for you, Clarisse."

"Then would you join me, for my nap?"

"Your majesty?" Joseph stepped back and raised his eyebrows. Clarisse chuckled and held out her hand. Joseph shivered as his fingers met his queen's. She led him out of his office, dropped his hand, and headed toward her room.

The guards at the double doors to her suite bowed and opened the room for the queen and her head of security. Clarisse slipped off her shoes at the door, and eyed Joseph until he did the same. She moved toward the bed and sat down on the edge. Joseph stayed a few feet behind her, awkwardly standing in the middle of the room.

"Joseph?" Clarisse whispered, "would you like come here and sit with me?" Joseph felt a lump in his throat, and walked to the bed. He sat next to her and stared off into space.

Clarisse giggled. Joseph heard the sound of her laughter fill his ears and he smiled. He turned to her and grabbed her hand. "Which side would you like?" She asked. He let go of her hand and looked at the bed, motioning for her to take whichever she wanted, and she crawled up to the headboard. She leaned against it as Joseph joined her on the other side.

Clarisse had leaned against his shoulder many times, but never in a bed. He felt his breath catch at every inhale as the weight of her body pressed into his chest. He struggled while trying to place his hands somewhere non-threatening.

It had been a long time since someone had held her. She could hear his heart beat thumping against her ear. She fought off her smile as he placed his hands around her. She'd never felt so safe as in Joseph's arms.

Within a few moments, her breath evened out. She was asleep.

An hour later, when she woke from her nap, she felt Joseph running his hand gently over her hair. His fingertips smoothed over her forehead.

"Hello" she whispered. Joseph snapped his hand back.

"I'm sorry. I couldn't sleep"

"Oh Joseph, you didn't need to stay with me while I slept"

"You were so peaceful, I couldn't disturb you. And I wanted to stay." Clarisse smiled and sat up slowly.

"Well. Back to my duties, I suppose" she said. Joseph looked in her eyes, and he felt the normal tension magnified while his arms were still loosely draped around his queen. He wanted nothing more than to kiss her.

Clarisse tried to push her emotions to the back of her mind, but it was getting harder and harder to suppress what she felt. After more than 50 years of dedication to her country, fondness for her husband, and censorship of her feelings, Clarisse wanted to kiss Joseph. She was ready to kiss him.

He imagined what it would be like to touch her freely, to place a hand on her back and draw her closer to him. He imagined her body beneath his... Suddenly Joseph clambered out of the bed. "Your majesty. I must get back"

"Yes." Clarisse forced a smile, wishing she had the nerve to press her lips to his.

"Goodbye, Clarisse" Joseph kiss her hand and bowed slightly.

"I'll see you later, for the party?"

"Of course."

As the party wound to a close, Clarisse looked around for Joseph. As she stood off to the side she felt a hand slide into hers, and a whisper in her ear.

"I have one small regret from earlier, Clarisse"

"Do you?"

"I wish, more than anything, that I would have asked your permission to kiss you" Clarisse could feel her palms getting warm.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I realized too late that my dividers did not show up! Sorry about my story being a jump mess in chapter one!**

_Yes, I regret that, too. _Clarisse thought, moving her hands away, closing them into fists behind her back. All she had wanted was his lips on hers. All she had wanted was to feel his body close to hers. All she had wanted was Joseph.

But she couldn't tell him. She had to keep her decorum, and hold her emotions inside.

Joseph couldn't help but stare at Clarisse. He waited for her response as people mingled and danced around them. He heard the Prime Minister mention to his wife that he was looking for the queen. Joseph wondered if he should let her go or hide her away so they could finish this conversation in private.

"Joseph…I…" she paused, scared, but smiling. She didn't want Joseph to see her feelings, and she couldn't afford for parliament to see them. She gritted her teeth and spoke without moving her lips, "can we go outside?"

He nodded and led her outside, checking the patio for privacy and safety…out of necessity or nervousness, he wasn't sure.

Clarisse shivered slightly. The night was warm, but the breeze was cool enough to spread goose bumps across her upper body, despite the sheer sleeves on her dress. Joseph made a move to offer his coat, but Clarisse held up her hand.

"It wouldn't do to have my head of security underdressed on my patio."

Joseph chuckled slightly, and peered around. Clarisse took a deep breath. If she didn't speak now, she was sure she would keep quiet for the rest of her life.

"As for your regret…" Clarisse stepped closer to whisper in his ear, "why don't we take care of that someday?" Joseph frowned.

"Clarisse, if you'll forgive me, 'someday' has been coming for a long time"

"Oh Joseph..." her eyes darkened. She was so embarrassed at her inability to follow her heart. 'The queen' and 'the woman' were in constant internal battle, but nothing agitated the struggle as much as her head of security.

"My darling, please. Please decide if you want this. If you do, I'm yours."

A long pause fell over the pair. The muffled sounds of laughter came from inside. The party was coming to a close, but Clarisse knew that her life could begin again in this moment, if she only has the courage to judge the importance of her happiness.

She looked him in the eyes. "Yes."

"What?"

"Yes, I want this. I want you. But not here."

Joseph tried to suppress his groan. Clarisse, his queen, had just said that she wanted him. Finally, after so many years of lusting after, and coming to love the queen, she wanted him, too. It took every muscle in his body not to pin her against the castle wall and kiss her senseless.

Clarisse couldn't believe she had let those words come out of her mouth. She wished that she could shove them back into her heart and lock them away forever. Such a display of emotion was not appropriate, and it wasn't her way of doing things.

"You're shocked." She said, casting her eyes downward.

"No, I'm pleasantly surprised…and anxious to take you off this patio…" Joseph said quietly.

"Joseph…" Clarisse breathed a warning. "There's still a party to finish, and Mia…"

"Mia is fine, Clarisse" Joseph offered his hand, "What do you say? Want to run away from security with me?"

"I don't know if you've forgotten, but you _are_ security" Clarisse smirked "Oh…why not?" Clarisse took his hand and squeezed it. Joseph leaned down to kiss her hand.

"Excellent," Joseph jumped over the railing onto the grass. "My queen?"

"Joseph, you don't expect me…in this dress…I can't…"

Joseph held out his hand once again and raised his eyebrows suggestively. Clarisse rolled her eyes slightly, making Joseph grin. He watched as she sat daintily on the edge of the balustrade.

"You had better catch me."

He mocked feeling taken aback.

"Have I ever let you fall before, Clarisse?"

A sudden wave of emotion and memory came over her. Every precious moment of this palace was punctuated by Joseph. He'd been one step behind her, watching her back for most of her life. He had never let her fall.

"No. No, you haven't." Clarisse let herself slide over the edge a bit, into his arms, and safely onto the grass. As her feet touched the ground, Clarisse turned to face her head of security. "Do it now, please."

"Clarisse…once I start, I don't know if I'll be able to stop kissing you" Clarisse reached for his hand in the dimness of the rose garden.

"Take me someplace" she insisted. Joseph obliged, pulling her along, through the hedges and into a darkened corner of the grounds.

Clarisse noticed a small wooden bench that she had never seen. Joseph explained that this was the portion of the grounds where the staff came to eat lunch, and to meet with each other on breaks. Clarisse raised her eyebrows, and Joseph further explained that it was, indeed, a place for many staff rendezvous.

She nodded, and suddenly became suspicious of the source of Joseph's knowledge.

"The maids talk, my dear…" Joseph broke through her thoughts. She shook her head. She should know better.

"Forgive me for even thinking it" Clarisse leaned into Joseph's chest when they sat on the small bench. "Now, we have the small matter of a kiss, I believe"

Joseph's voice caught in his throat. His hand came up to her face, and he cupped her cheek gingerly. It had been so long since he had kissed anyone. And he'd never kissed anyone he loved.

Joseph was alone for most of his life. There were fleeting relationships, and a few short affairs, but no one stuck. He'd tried to reason with himself, but no one was ever…_her. _No one was ever his Clarisse. He wished he had made his move earlier. He also sometimes wished he'd never let her in.

They knew everything there was to know about each other. Clarisse knew that Joseph liked cigars only after midnight. Joseph knew that Clarisse became frazzled after 18 hours of being awake. She had only let him in. Clarisse knew that Joseph once loved a girl named Kiara when he lived in Italy, but she was engaged to someone else. Joseph knew that Clarisse never loved her husband, but stayed faithful throughout her entire life.

No one else but Joseph could cross the barrier that she had built.

He let himself look her straight in the eye for what seemed like ages. She licked her lips in anticipation of what was to come.

She hadn't been touched like this in 20 years. And even then, her husband only kissed her if he wanted to satisfy his biological needs. Rupert wasn't a skilled lover. Clarisse, consequently, assumed that she was the same. She was nervous to touch, nervous to kiss, and couldn't bear to think about what could happen later.

"Your majesty, Queen Clarisse Renaldi…may I have the absolute pleasure of pressing my peasant mouth to your royal lips?" Clarisse smiled. He always knew how to calm her nerves, and he always knew when to do so.

The first touch was so light that Clarisse wasn't sure if the kiss had happened yet. Their lips danced around each other, meeting for an evanescent touch, only to part again. The tension built low in her stomach, in a place that she didn't know how to access. She only knew that she needed more pressure.

Daringly, she placed her hand on the back of his neck, and pushed Joseph into her. He groaned at the meeting of mouths, flush, excited, passionate, and needy.

Joseph moved his hands to her lower back, pulling her in closer, licking her bottom lip before taking it into his mouth. Clarisse moaned his name softly, the sound coming from deep inside her throat. She gasped as his tongue pushed its way into her mouth, entwining with hers. She could feel herself unravelling in his hands.

He could not get close enough from his position. The sleeves of her dress blocked her waist if she held her hands up, and the beads scratched at him as he tried to navigate the folds of fabric. Clarisse sensed his struggle, and expertly reached behind her, to reveal the trick of the design. As she unclipped the draping sleeves, Joseph sighed longingly. Though she hadn't removed clothing, she had provided access to her arms, her waist, and more of her back. At times, he touched her firmly. Now, he ran his fingertips over her body like she would shatter from the pressure.

"Better?" He nodded and dove back into his worship of her lips. He bit and suckled on her bottom lip, and she melted into his arms. Clarisse didn't know what she was doing. The back of her mind screamed at her to stop his ministrations and go back to the palace. But her body screamed at her to push the limits of what her mind had planned to do.

Clarisse pulled back from him, and he dropped his arms immediately. He was dreading this moment. She had changed her mind. He scared her off. He was too needy, too excited. His hands were burning with shame. How could he ever hurt her like this? _Stupid man. What were you thinking?_

"I'm sorry, your majesty" his eyes watered at the corners. She thought for a moment that he may shed a tear, but realized quickly that whatever he was feeling was rooted in shame.

"Sorry for what, exactly?" she reached up to his face and ran her fingers from his temple to the base of his neck as if charting a path.

"Letting it go too far. I'll help you reconstruct your dress and take you…" she sealed off his sentence with a short, ardent kiss.

"You'll do no such thing, Joseph" He perked up, but still held his hands down on the bench, away from the softness of her skin, away from the coarse beading of the dress, away from the warmth of her lips. "I was just evaluating how to get you to be as underdressed for this weather as I." He whipped off his coat and undid his tie in a flash of fervent yearning.

"Better?"

Clarisse mocked judgment. "Only slightly. What if…" She reached forward and undid the buttons on his dress shirt. "Ah. There."

"My darling…" he breathed, reaching for her.


	3. Chapter 3

**I AM SO SORRY THIS TOOK A TURN BUT I HOPE YOU STILL LIKE IT OKAY. **

**CLARISSE AND JOSEPH WILL BE OKAY I PROMISE. **

**XoxoxoxoX**

"My darling…" he breathed, reaching for her.

"Joseph, you must promise me that no one will know what happens tonight – I can't imagine what they would say if they knew…"

"Clarisse!" He cut her off, "My love, I do have some sense, after 40 years of working for you, I know what is appropriate and inappropriate" Clarisse raised her eyebrows, her eyes darting to his open shirt and exposed chest. He chuckled. "I know what is appropriate to share, I mean."

"Ah," she said quietly, folding her hands in her lap and wringing them nervously. "Joseph…I'm scared." It was always he that had protected her. Now it was Joseph who was at fault for her undoing. She trusted him more than anyone she had ever known, yet now, she was wary of his feelings. No one could possibly feel the way that he did for her. She wanted so badly to believe that his unbridled passion was presented with the best of intentions – that he would move at a pace where she could catch her breath. It had been over 10 years since she had last been touched. The time had flown by, but now it seemed like a lifetime.

Every nerve in her body tingled when his skin touched hers. She supposed that it always had been so. But she suppressed it as best she could – it wouldn't do for a queen to come undone at the touch of her head of security. It wasn't professional to have such thoughts, and especially to act on them. But it was happening now. Losing control wasn't a pleasant feeling, and all Clarisse wanted was to regain it. If he kissed her, or touched her, or if anymore clothes came off…she was surely lost forever. Clarisse wasn't sure that she was ready to be lost.

"My love…" he cupped her cheek, "we don't have to go any farther. This can end like this. This ends when you want it to."

Joseph didn't want to hurt her. His own needs had always come after hers, and though he was finally getting what he wanted, he had enough control to know that it was really his queen that had the control – his queen SHOULD have the control. She makes the choices, no matter how intimate the situation. He couldn't bear to be the cause of any emotional or physical pain.

"Thank you, Joseph" Clarisse covered his hand with her own. She could feel how cold he was, and she could feel him trembling. _Joseph? The strongest man she knew was shaking? Was it the temperature or the thought of where this could go? _"are you shaking?"

"Yes. I was hoping you wouldn't notice" Clarisse smiled at him in the darkness. Here in this place where so many others had professed their love, their lust, here in this dimly lit garden – she may remember what it feels like to be real. "Clarisse, it's just been so long since I've touched someone. So long that I've wanted to touch you" He wondered how long it had been that Clarisse had been touched. He assumed that she hadn't been with anyone since Rupert's death. And he assumed that she and Rupert were not together in his last few years on Earth.

"Then touch me, Joseph" She purred, "Touch me, now." He leaned forward and moved his hands to her exposed upper back. He looked into her eyes and waited for a sign that Clarisse, the dutiful queen of Genovia, had finally lost to Clarisse, the woman. She nodded and their lips met again, touching and tasting, nibbling and suckling for what felt like hours. As they kissed, Joseph's hands moved over her body gently, at first, then with pressure and ardent need. He groaned as her hands pushed under his shirt and her nails moved down his spine. His hands moved to her breasts, palms moving flat to feel her through her dress.

Joseph moved back to look at her. My god she was beautiful with her chest moving up and down – out of breath from their making out like a couple of teenagers. It was as if he had been waiting all his life for this moment to present himself. Her hair was tousled slightly, her lipstick had removed itself from her mouth.

"My god…" he whispered. Clarisse looked behind her in a panic. Had someone seen?

"What?" She said sharply.

"You. You are just…" He moved in on her, close as he could get to her without pushing her off the bench. "You're so perfect, _mi reina_."

Before she could answer, their lips met again.

Lost in the moment, they didn't notice the sprinkle of rain begin to fall from the sky.

**XoxoX**

Soon, it was pouring. Joseph pulled back from Clarisse and threw his jacket over her.

"Oh, it's no use, Joseph. I'm already soaked. God, what will they say…?"

"I'll tell them I escorted you on a walk around the gardens, and we were too far away to get back in time." Joseph grinned as she struggled to move her hair out of her eyes.

"I don't want to go back yet – I'm not ready to go inside without you." Clarisse grabbed his collar and pulled him into a blinding kiss. Joseph could feel himself losing control and coaxed Clarisse into kneeling on the bench so they could be closer to skin on skin. Clarisse had her own ideas and she put herself in the position to straddle Joseph. The rain dripped down her forehead and onto him as she sat down on his lap.

Joseph silently cursed. He begged his desire to control itself. It wouldn't do to have a loss of control when she was so close. As if Clarisse could read his mind – or the pained look on his face – she spoke.

"It's okay, Joseph. I can handle it." She grinned at him and pushed his shirt off his shoulders, leaving him exposed to nature. "I am a grown woman, after all."

"Not funny, Clarisse…" He growled jokingly, moving his hands to her lower back, whether to pull her closer or to push himself away, he wasn't sure.

"On the contrary, I think it is quite funny indeed." Clarisse moved her hips forward, where she could feel him swelling beneath her.

"How did I know that you would be a tease?" He closed his eyes and dug his fingers into her back, wanting nothing more than to rip the soaked clothing off of her.

She looked taken aback. "Did you think about this, Joseph? This moment?"

"For 40 years, my dear." Joseph remembered all of the nights that he imagined what she would feel like in his arms. How he would kiss her, how he would hold her close. He remembered the welcomed inappropriate dreams that left him drenched in sweat and embarrassed for the rest of the week.

"Oh…Joseph…" Clarisse sighed, looking at her head of security, wondering if she should admit what she had been thinking.

"I'm sorry, if that hurts you, or surprises, or disgusts you, that's not the most pleasant thing I've ever had to admit" Clarisse wondered if he had ever touched himself to the thought of her.

"Joseph, I have, too" Clarisse confessed, dipping down to kiss him, running her hands down his chest, to the belt on his pants. "Have you ever thought of me when…no nevermind" Clarisse blushed at her vulgar question.

"What are you asking me, Queen Clarisse Renaldi?" Joseph grinned and whispered the answer in her ear. She gasped, whispering something in his ear that made him bite his lip and guaranteed that he had lost all control.

She began to undo his belt - certain that finally being closer to him would be much better than the last 10 years of making love to her imagination.

"Clarisse," he groaned, "Please don't, unless you're sure you are ready. I don't want you to regret anything."

"I am. Joseph. I'm sure" Joseph helped her to get up and stand near the garden shed. He gently backed her into the wall, as she reached for his belt again and undid the buckle. He kneeled down, ignoring the pain in his joints, and felt around for the bottom of her dress. He hiked it up to her knees and held it as he covered her body and kissed her. Clarisse moaned softly as his hand found the inside of her thigh.

With Rupert, it had been painful, humiliating, and mercifully quick. Clarisse knew it wasn't supposed to be this way if you were in love. But her body was conditioned to expect an unpleasant experience. As she remembered her husband forcefully positioning himself over her, tears pooled at the corner of her eyes. And when the water that Joseph tasted turned salty, he let go and stepped back with his hands in the air in front of his chest. He started to apologize when Clarisse sank to the ground, a mess of soaked clothing, wet hair and hot tears across her face.  
"Clarisse…" Joseph lunged for her and sat down on the wet ground, pulling her into his embrace as she cried, "It's okay, my darling, it's okay. I'm here."

"I'm…so…sorry…Joseph" She choked out. "There must be something wrong with me…I…was…so…sure that…I was…ready…"

"No, my love, there is nothing wrong with you, my God, I am the one who should be sorry…please…forgive me. We moved too fast. I pushed you too far…"

"I wanted this…wanted you…I did. When we got so close, all I could remember was him…"

"Clarisse…" Joseph warned. He wanted her to share if she felt comfortable, but didn't want her to feel she had to elaborate.

"Joseph, I never once wanted to with him. I never wanted him to touch me like that. But…we had to. My duty…I…" Clarisse silenced herself by pushing her face into Joseph's shoulder. When she came up for air, she finished. "He never even asked…"

Joseph froze with anger and disgust toward the late king. How dare he take something from Clarisse like that? How dare he hurt someone that Joseph loved so much…and under his watch. And how could he comfort her, knowing that she had been tortured as long as she had been queen. Knowing that something that should be fun and pleasurable had been turned to memories of abuse. All he could do was noiselessly curse the king and pull her closer.

"Clarisse…do you trust me?" She nodded.

"More than anyone, and you know that isn't it, Joseph…"

"I know, my love. I know. I want to get you back safely inside. It's cold and we're both soaked, your majesty." He smiled at her, moving the hair back from her forehead.

Clarisse sighed, wiping the remaining tears from her eyes. "Yes, let's go inside. I'd love some tea. But Joseph…"

"Yes?"

"Don't leave me, please. I can't be alone right now."

Joseph's eyes widened as he stood and helped her off the ground. Her trust must be deeper than he thought. For her to show any need, anything that could be misconstrued as weakness, surely meant that she was finally letting herself be his.


	4. Chapter 4

**XoxoxoX**

Entering the palace brought a whole new set of problems. All of the doors had been locked in the evening, and keys from the outside didn't even exist for security reasons. The only door open was the one in the front, meaning that they needed to walk all the way around the building.

One of Joseph's favorite things about Clarisse was her perseverance. She was a woman who had every right to complain, and never did. She just moved forward as if no one could touch her. So walking around the building didn't bother her at all. Joseph wished he had the strength and the privacy where he could carry her, held close to him, as if his ability to pick her up off the ground could take away some of the weight she carried in her heart.

Joseph was struggling with the fact that his queen had spent at least 30 years of her life enduring abuse from her husband. He was always careful to be polite with her, to ask to touch, but now he wondered if anything he did had hurt her further. If his subtle flirting had ever been too much. He was glad that her tears warned of her distress; if they hadn't stopped, and she had been hurt, he would be blaming himself for the rest of his life.

Clarisse had never told anyone how Rupert treated her, so for now her plans were to box it back up and never speak of it again. She needed to forgive, to forget, in order to move forward with Joseph. As much as she didn't want to admit it to herself or to him, she wanted to love Joseph with all of her heart. She wanted him to be a permanent person in the most intimate parts of her life – more than he already was. In fact, she did love him, somewhere inside herself she knew that. Rupert would not take that away from her – she wouldn't let him do that.

The queen knew she deserved to let herself be with a man who loved her more than life itself. A man that she loved in the same way. Joseph would never hurt her; she was sure. He had never made her feel anything but protected.

As they walked through the front doors of the palace, sighs of relief were heard from security and of course, Charlotte. Charlotte prided herself on knowing that the queen was missing WITH Joseph and it was all going to be okay – Joseph would always keep her safe.

"Your majesty, can I get you anything?" Charlotte spoke as she and a few security guards approached the queen.

Clarisse waved them off and asked Joseph loudly if he would escort her. All she wanted was some time to talk to him about what had, and what would, happen. She asked Charlotte to go to bed, and to tell the ladies maids to do the same – she could dress herself for bed tonight, after all, she was not incapable. Charlotte raised an eyebrow at the head of security, and he grinned slightly. Ever since Charlotte had been hired, she and Joe conversed about a wide variety of topics – and she was the only one who knew of Joseph's inappropriate love for her majesty.

Joseph's grin didn't mask the sadness in his eyes, and Charlotte made a point of noting to check on him tomorrow.

Entering the room together, soaking wet, tired and hurt, Joseph helped Clarisse lay out some towels on the sofa. Clarisse went into her room to change, and promptly noticed that she had not allowed Joseph to do the same.

She emerged from her room in a silk nightgown. Something she had not worn in what felt like centuries. Joseph inhaled sharply when she walked out. He could see every curve of her body, and he fought against his thoughts; his main concern now was her emotional safety.

"Oh, Joseph. You should get out of those wet things" she said softly, with concern coloring her voice. Joseph raised his eyebrow, and she swatted at him playfully. He grinned.

"You're right. I should. But a certain lady asked me not to leave. So if you don't mind, I'll just take this off?" He pulled at his shirt and waited for her nod. She agreed and waited for him to do so, handing him a towel and sitting down next to him.

"Oh, I forgot tea…" Clarisse sounded incredibly defeated, Joseph smiled.

"I can make it, love" Clarisse stared at his exposed back, watching his muscles as he moved. A few minutes later, he brought it over and set it on the table in front of them. His method was hardly fancy, but it was effective. Clarisse cradled the cup in her hands and sighed softly, relishing in the warmth.

"Thank you, Joseph" she said, leaning over to kiss him softly.

"It's just tea, Clarisse"

"No, for everything. For being so understanding and kind" Clarisse set down her tea and leaned against his chest, "Oh! You are so cold." She jumped up and pulled the fluffy comforter off of her bed, dragging it across the room and laying it over top of him, before climbing under it herself. She leaned against him again. "Better."

"May I put my arm around you, my dear?" He asked softly.

"Oh Joseph…you don't need to ask to cuddle or kiss me anymore. I think we've passed that point…." Her voice softened, "But I know why you did. So thank you, and my answer is yes." She smiled and reveled in the feeling of his strong arm around her. He kissed her forehead. She moved her hand over his chest, feeling the beating of his heart against her fingers.

"Clarisse?" he asked, pulling her tighter, "I am so…sorry…that…he treated you…like that…"

"Joseph…none of this is your fault. None of it is anyone's fault but his. It took me a long time to decide this, but it is where I choose to place the blame." Clarisse kissed Joseph softly, and looked him in the eye. "I must move toward forgiveness, Joseph. There is no sense in being angry at him. He didn't realize what he was doing…and anyway, he's gone now…may he rest in peace…"

"You're right, but I just…I won't be him, Clarisse. Ever. If anything makes you uncomfortable, you must promise me that you will let me know. I can't hurt you in that way. I would never forgive myself.

"I promise" she sighed contentedly, closing her eyes while leaning against his chest. Joseph ran his hand absentmindedly through her hair, making trails down her neck and across her shoulders. "I would like to try again, Joseph. Someday. Soon."

Joseph felt all of his muscles stiffen at her words. He leaned down and captured her lips in a firm kiss. She smiled against him. "Kiss me more"

He happily obliged, running his hands over her back, taking her bottom lip into his mouth, kissing her as long as he could – to make up for 40 years of wanting. He pulled back to look at her, and folded her into his arms. She snuggled into him, tired and happy. He suggested that she move to the bed, and she rose from the couch, holding out her hand to Joseph. He took it, and she dragged him with her. She gently pushed him down, climbing onto him and kissing him again. Finally they settled, exhausted, and slept until morning, tangled together.


End file.
